There were some lessons that I learned from this experience. The first “aha!” moment came at the pre-party. Shortly after arrival and making the rounds, this guy made a big flourish upon seeing me, professing me to be hot and that he wanted to rub my nipples. Then he did. He rubbed them right through my corset. And he did it again later using his beer bottle. I was floored. Where were this man’s boundaries? And, for that matter, where were mine? So there it is. Men aren’t used to setting boundaries because they don’t have to. I’ll be more aware of that next time.
When contemplating that lesson after the evening, I had a realization. It was about something I thought that I had understood, but I believe that I see more now. When people put time and energy into making themselves beautiful and feminine, it is empowering. And, it also exposes them to unaware men who may not respect or recognize their boundaries. I get it. Fuck me pumps? What an unfair name! Just because someone chooses to wear something that makes them alluring doesn’t mean they welcome all advances. And it obviously doesn’t mean they want just anyone to fuck them. Duh.
By the way, nipple guy? Later in the evening his girlfriend came up and said she was ready to leave. He told her that he would be going home with me. She seemed happy with that.